You ain't nothing but a hound blog...

"They said you was high class, well that was just a lie."  Standard par there from Elvis.  What a "g."  I have been thinking recently about the legacy and indeed the present situation with rock music.  It all began really with Elvis in the 50's with rock and roll, where there was such excitement about seeing him sing.  He caught the world like a storm.  He starred in films and was good looking - as the women knew.  The Beatles revolutionised the way we listen to music today and their influence can be seen in many artists, most noticeably, Oasis.  My point in saying all this is that the spark of rock music is burning out.  Take Glastonbury for instance; a festival renowned for it's huge rock acts.  Well a few years ago Jay-Z headlined the event.  His music is good, he has some cracking lyrics too.  Still, usually I would much rather listen to Oasis on an off day, than him at his best.  Saying this, I do go through odd phases of liking a few random artists.  For example N-Dubz, where I liked there catchy singles.  The thing is though, now think about this; the music that stands the test of time is often rock music.  Music that sounds as fresh today as it did when it was released maybe twenty or thirty years ago.  I do like a variety of music though, it's just I have noticed this change particularly in rock.  Anyway, that aside, did you think Jude Law looked dapper at Cannes?  I did.  He is a man men love to hate, but he pulled off a tux well.  I have bought two silk ties to accompany my suits.  Hopefully I will have much success wearing them - pulling women ;D

Today I had two exams.  The English went well I think.  However the French was poor.  I wouldn't be surprised if I got 20/40 on that paper.  My dad re-assured me though that French "won't earn you money" and "don't worry, French is not your language."  How was the first day of public exams for you?  Good probably.  Or as Cein Hannan would put it, "grand."  There is your shout out, subtly done.

This weekend saw Manchester United win the Premier League.  It also released West Ham from its majestic grasp.  Don't you think it's awful that attempted attacks are repeatedly being tried on Neil Lennon, the Celtic manager?  There is clearly a fierce rivalry in Scotland still.  People need to move on.  History is history.  The Irish are discontented about the queen visiting the republic too.  Again, patriotic paddy's (plosive alliteration) are remembering when times weren't so stable.  This hatred was just, but not any more.  Lets not get BLOGGED down with all this.  Sorry if I am overdoing it with the puns.

I have heard another funny limerick, and well I haven't done one in a while so here it is:

An agreeable girl named Miss Doves

Likes to fondle the young men she loves.

She will use her bare fist

If the fellows insist

But she really prefers to wear gloves  

Good luck in the remainder of your exams people.

Yours sincerely, Goobs.  

  

Seven days without a pun makes one weak...

So, we've made it to the end of year 11.  It seems a little strange because I can clearly remember sitting in an assembly when the year began and staff telling us just how quickly the year would go.  They weren't lying.  If Concorde could represent a year, it would be year 11 :)  So now we just have to go in for exams and revise of course.  My compulsory education is finished, and that ladies and gentlemen is a mile stone.  From now on we have the choice of what to study or seek employment etc.  I have chosen English and I have been told I am foolish by some off my peers.  They're probably right.  But lets "roll with the punches."  Congratulations anyway everyone!          


We are in the thick of exams and revision at the moment,  or "rolling in the deep."  Lets hope we don't look back and say: "we could have had it all..."  I am happy with my coursework results in Geography and History, both of which were quite tricky to do well in.  I seem set up for the exams.  The final hurdle is my mentality and ability to remain cool through this period.  All of this aside, lets talk about TV for a second.  The new series of "The Apprentice" began on Tuesday.  What do you think?  I think that series is always a winner.  Lord Sugar helps add tension and depth to the program.  They manage to represent a positive aspect of business, and put aside some of the corporate façade.  Waterloo Road has also been re-introduced.  What I can say about it is that it's intense!  How do feel about wearing suits?  I have recently purchased two suits, but it's quite difficult them as you can imagine.  GQ magazine are always banging on about men releasing their sartorial side anyway.  


With the Premier League coming to an end soon, and Wimbledon beginning, there is plenty to watch in sport.   Is Lionel Messi unstoppable?  He will test Man Utd if he is in good form in the Champions League final.  Have you noticed that Man Utd tend to play Ji-sung Park in the "big" games?  It shows the influence he has.  Ok. that's enough on sport.  I recently discovered that Megan Fox models for Armani.  A reason to purchase their clothing?  I think so ;)  The premier for the new Pirates of the Caribbean film occurred yesterday.  No doubt there were women fainting as Johnny Depp passed.  I was unsatisfied with the last film though.  It was a bum numbing three hours and a little weak in terms of plot.  Well this one has Penelope Cruz and will be shown in 3D.  This summer will see the release of "Cowboys and Aliens" which features Daniel Craig.  Is it worth going to see, just for Olivia Wilde?  


I know there is much more I could comment on to do with school memorabilia, but I have written enough for now.  To end this blog, and indeed the school year I will share with you some school/subject related pun liners:


To write with a broken pencil is pointless.


When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

Gravity is studied a lot because it’s a very attractive field.

The poet had written better poems, but he’d also written verse.

When chemists die, we barium

Good luck everyone in the exams.  Before you know it, it'll be X-mas!  

Love for Michael Goober Price.

  

Is Utilitarian the new Sexy?

Are you sick of my corny puns?  If so, here is a more "bloggish" title.   If you are reading this with English analytical skills, you may even say that a question helps include and engage the reader.  Well whatever.  This question is a surprisingly interesting question to ponder on in the society we live in these days.  If you can utilise something, it means you might become fond of it.  You may not consider it "sexy," but nevertheless it's useful in your life.  However I believe the two go hand in hand.  Take "Apple" products for example.  The I-pad is unquestionably handsome, but it's also useful.  ("It can't make you a cup of tea though," as grandparents would say.)  I don't own one though.  The same pattern can be observed in the I-pod and many other gadgets.  The best combination would be a sexy looking car (like a Lamborghini) which was incredibly satisfying to drive - and reliable.  Items like cutlery and napkins serve a purpose, but they aren't sexy.  Still, the world is becoming increasingly picky about aesthetics and utilitarianism.  Progress has been made in the last 50 years then.  I thought I would just take your mind of the imminent exams briefly anyway.     

Today my bus was a little bit annoying.  I pressed the "stop" button three times, and the bus driver seemed ignorant to this.  I ended up being dropped up in Gerrards Cross town instead of where I wanted to be dropped.  Oh well, I got some exercise I suppose.  It is good for the old ticker.  I also received my citizenship card which is supposed to give a pittance of a reduction on items in certain Slough shops.  Who would want to shop in Slough!?  That's putting it candidly - it's useful I suppose ;)  We all know we have exams starting on Monday.  How well prepared are you?

In sport, and more specifically football; Manchester Untied seem destined to win the Premier League.  Liverpool won extremely comfortably last night against Fulham, 5-2. I am more happy about Wycombe Wanderers gaining promotion though.  You see, not a complete gloryhunter am I?  So as my academic year draws to a close, I have been pondering on my time in compulsory education.  It hasn't passed that quickly actually.  It's an important stage in my life of course though with exams and sixth form coming soon.  I hope my destiny is a rosy as Manchester United's then.

To everyone doing exams soon; I wish you the very best of luck.

Love from Inspector Goobs.          
 

Do you have the time, to listen to me whine? About nothing and everything all at once...

Well as the GCSE exams approach extremely rapidly, how are you coping with the pressure?  Anyway, I don't want to get bogged down with exams so lets look on the bright side.  It's Friday!  Also the weather is fine, but a little muggy don't you think?  I know we only had to soldier on for four days this week, but I am quite tired.  It's all the mock exams I suppose.  After school today I bought a Burberry shirt.  The main reason is that I clumsily stained one of my other "nice" shirts with butter, which is relentlessly sticking to it.  I know you might mock me for choosing Burberry because it used to be the preferred clothing line of chavs, but their clothes are fit.  I like to extend the range of designers I buy from too.  Oh, happy birthday to Adrian!  Have a great day man.   

I seem to have the case of writers blog.  The combination of not having enough time, not being arsed and not knowing what to write has got to me.  I was going to call this entry "The princess and the blog" but that didn't quite cut it.  Instead I chose some Green day lyrics.  Actually, thinking about it now that title may have been appropriate after the royal wedding.  Oh, have you noticed Kate Middleton's buff sister Pippa?  She was helping carry Kate's dress at the wedding I think.  Anyway her bottom has caused a stir in the media and indeed has raised the attention of the nation.  I was reading an article in the daily mail the other day, which was dedicated to her bottom mostly and also the factual stuff of course.  With Osama Bin Laden's death on Monday too, we have had a lot to digest.  Here's my theory anyway.  I feel Al-Qaeda may retaliate but very surreptitiously.  So this is not the end of terrorism unfortunately.  But it's a step forward.

There is a true two horse race in the Premier League battle this year.  Man Utd have left it very late.  They should have one it by now, but Chelsea have clawed back the points and reeled in an increasingly distant campaign for them until recently.  Who knows what will happen.  The match this weekend will be telling though.  Apparently Andy Murray was knocked out of the Madrid Open.  Perhaps he will reserve his best form for Wimbledon, where many Britons will put their hopes on his shoulders.  The media keep bringing up the statistic about the last British player to win it being Fred Perry in 1933 (that's off the top of my head, don't quote me).  Well, lets see what happens.

I haven't found a decent limerick to share with you and I am sure you are saturated with the endless Bin Laden jokes.  So have a nice weekend everyone.

Love from Mick.       

An Inspector's "Squiffy" Balls...

Well here I am, 16 years old already.  I was thinking about the changes one acknowledges when they turn 16, such as being able to work and join gyms etc.  It's actually quite a "big" birthday in a way then.  Today I went into London and had a great time walking around Chelsea and Knightsbridge where I bought a suit and some shirts.  I seemed to have acquired a designer wardrobe.  The weather was lovely too, which helped raise morale.  My profile picture shows me standing next to a gorgeous Lamborghini.  It is a nice picture, but I so wish that it was mine.  Now that is a car with real presence.  You could even call it art, if you were Jeremy Clarkson anyway.  


The pomp and pageantry of the royal wedding was shown yesterday.  The nation and indeed much of the planet saw Prince William marry the beautiful Kate Middleton.  I said to myself beforehand: "Michael, don't watch it!"  Inevitably though, I did.  If anything, I got to see Kate Middleton and her sister gracing Westminster ;)  What did you think of the occasion?  Is this a step forward for the monarchy?  Anyway, women all over the country are pining for Prince Harry now.  He is a good looking lad I suppose, and he's ginger.  Some party poopers have blamed the BBC for being obsequious and forning though.


The world of sport is all go at the moment.  Chelsea beat Tottenham today, in what will be an important three points for them.  In snooker, the young Judd Trump beat Ding in the semi final of the World Championships.  I enjoy watching snooker, I find it relaxing.  Wycombe Wanderers won today which I am really pleased about.  This could see them gain promotion to League 1 then.  Ben Strevens you beast!  Finally ending your goal drought.  


I heard this amusing Limerick recently, so see what you think:

There was a young gigolo named Bruno

Who said, "Screwing's one thing I do know.

While women are fine,

And sheep are divine,

Llama's are numero uno!"

I hope you all have a lovely Sunday and bank holiday Monday.  Chill out (unless you have exams that is).

Love from Goobs.   

             

Easter Bunny > Playboy Bunny...

Happy Easter everyone!  It seems that the man upstairs has blessed us with lovely weather to mark the occasion.  So how is your Easter going?  Good I hope.  I spent it with my family which is right I think.  So, at least at Easter, the Easter bunny is more significant than playboy bunnies.  However, Hugh Hefner might not agree.  As we are not children any more, I suppose we lose the excitable feeling on Easter of receiving many chocolate eggs.  Then come activities like Easter egg hunts etc.  It's a fun time for children then.  I hope to enjoy today and tomorrow relaxing and then go back for Wednesday and Thursday for a two day week in school.

There have been some significant sporting fixtures recently too.  For Arsenal fans, yesterday ended their title winning hopes.  Bolton beat them 2-1.  I feel that Arsenal certainly have the talent, but they are just inconsistent.  Still, Chelsea are still in the title race with six points behind Man Utd after beating West Ham 3-0.  A late Javier Hernandez goal saw Man Utd secure a vital three points at Everton.  I feel Man Utd should just win it still.  Speaking of Man Utd, yesterday there was a remarkable film about the Busby Babes which was poignant and moving - very good though (called "United").  I feel that as a result of the disastrous plane crash in Munich, 1958, the Man Utd fan base support grew and grew.  It was a tragedy, but still, Man Utd are a great team today. The snooker is on, and well, some of it has been quite entertaining, whilst other matches have been like watching paint dry.  That's enough on sport I think.  I am keen not to offend Arsenal fans.  Anyway, with a royal wedding this Friday, what will you be doing?  Watching it?  I probably won't.  I could end up revising that day at this rate.

Here's a joke I heard recently.
What did Nicole Scherzinger say when she was leaving a glamour model agency?
"If you think I'm coming back, don't hold your bre-easts!"
It made me laugh the first time I heard it.

In the movie Kalifornia, Brad Pitt, out of the blue starting singing this amusing rhyme:
Do your balls hang low?
Do they wobble too and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you throw 'em over your shoulder, like a continental soldier?
Do your balls. Hang. Low?

Funny eh?  It's a lovely morning out, so get out and enjoy it.  Enjoy what's left of your holiday and bear in mind the two days off we have soon.

Love from Pricey.

Blog the Builder...

The surprisingly good weather we have had this April is set to continue - well at least for this week into the Easter weekend.  Usually one associates April with showers, but we have had very little rainfall this year really.  To take advantage of this weather, I decided to go to Wendover Woods today.  It's a lovely forest which has the highest point of the Chiltern Hills.  It's almost like being up a mountain, where there are spectacular views.  I would recommend going if you get the chance.  It makes a nice change to revising anyway.  It's pleasant just relaxing in a restaurant in the sunshine.  I hope the weather remains like this for my birthday next week. 


The World Champion Snooker season has begun.  I quite like watching snooker, and I realise that sometimes it's incredibly boring.  My favourite player is Ronnie O'Sullivan.  Away from the snooker - in football it seems likely that Manchester United will win the Premier League then.  Still, do you feel that football players are ridiculously over-payed for kicking a ball around every week?  Munster continue to succeed in the rugby too.  Elsewhere in TV, EastEnders have finally concluded the baby swap storyline.  They were playing on that for about four months.  I was watching Hollyoaks today for the first time in several years and it seems not much has changed.  Warren is still the don or the "Phil Mitchell" of Cheshire.


There isn't much else to mention at the moment, so I will leave with a limerick.


There was a young lady from Ealing,
Who protested she lacked sexual feeling,
til a cynic named Boris,
Licked her Clitoris,
And left her legless and squealing.


Sorry people, that is a rude one but it mentions Ealing which is where I spent some of my childhood so I used it.  Have a grand week everyone.


Love from Pricey.